The tragic shooting death of 37-year-old ICU nurse Alex Jeffrey Pretti by federal agents in Minneapolis on January 24, 2026, was already a national flashpoint. But in the days since his passing, a far more personal and disturbing narrative has begun to emerge — one that threatens to dismantle the portrait of a compassionate, devoted caregiver that dominated early tributes.

Multiple sources close to Pretti’s ex-wife, Jessica Pretti, have come forward with accounts that paint a starkly different picture of their marriage, which ended in divorce in late 2023 after eight turbulent years. Jessica, who shares two young children with Alex, has not spoken publicly since the shooting. However, close friends and former colleagues speaking on condition of anonymity have described a relationship marked by emotional volatility, controlling behavior, and what one source called “a pattern of cruelty that left Jessica deeply traumatized.”

The most painful revelations center on Jessica’s repeated miscarriages — at least four documented between 2017 and 2022. Friends claim Alex became increasingly distant and dismissive during these losses, refusing to attend doctor appointments, minimizing Jessica’s grief, and in some instances blaming her for the miscarriages. One former friend of the couple recounted a conversation in which Alex allegedly told Jessica, “Maybe it’s your body that can’t handle it,” after the third loss — a remark that reportedly devastated her and contributed to the breakdown of trust in the marriage.

Jessica’s own journal entries (shared privately with close confidants and later referenced in legal filings during the divorce) describe nights of sobbing alone while Alex stayed late at the hospital or attended protests, returning home emotionally unavailable. “He would say he was fighting for justice for others,” one entry reads, “but he couldn’t even sit with me when I needed him most.” The couple’s sex life reportedly deteriorated after the miscarriages, with Alex withdrawing physically and emotionally, leaving Jessica feeling “invisible and worthless.”

The allegations stand in stark contrast to the public image Alex cultivated — that of a gentle, empathetic nurse who stayed late to comfort families, advocated for immigrant patients, and presented himself as a pillar of compassion. Colleagues at the hospital have defended that image, describing him as “consistently kind” and “the one who always knew what to say to grieving relatives.” Yet the emerging accounts from Jessica’s circle suggest a private life far removed from that persona — one marked by emotional neglect, verbal cruelty, and a growing obsession with activism that allegedly pulled him further from his family responsibilities.

The couple’s divorce was acrimonious. Court documents reveal heated disputes over custody, child support, and allegations of emotional abuse on both sides. Jessica sought sole physical custody, citing Alex’s “erratic behavior and increasing involvement in radical groups” as destabilizing for the children. The final decree granted joint legal custody but awarded Jessica primary physical custody, with Alex receiving supervised visitation rights after allegations surfaced that he had become “increasingly agitated and unpredictable” around the children.

Since the shooting, Jessica has remained silent publicly, but sources close to her say she is “devastated yet not surprised” by the turn of events. “She loved him once,” one friend said. “But she spent years trying to protect herself and the kids from a man who was unraveling. Now the world is seeing pieces of what she lived with.”

The revelations have divided public opinion. Supporters of Alex argue the allegations are unfair posthumous attacks on a grieving man who can no longer defend himself. Others see them as evidence that the “compassionate nurse” narrative was incomplete — a polished facade that concealed deeper personal failings.

As the federal investigation into the shooting continues and the Pretti family prepares for funeral services, the emerging details about Alex’s marriage add a painful new dimension to an already tragic story. The devoted caregiver, the loving father, the passionate advocate — all of these may have been true. But so, perhaps, was the man who left his wife feeling unseen, unheard, and ultimately alone in her grief.

For Jessica and their children, the loss is twofold: the death of the man Alex once was, and the painful acknowledgment that the man he became may have contributed to the unraveling of their family long before that final, fatal confrontation on a Minneapolis street.